Bryanna and the City

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Splish/Splash!



Originally uploaded by bryanna1.
One of my many New Year's resolutions is to be more self-assertive. By "self-assertive" I mean *excuse me while I rummage through my old Psych 320 notes*...ah, okay, by "self-assertive" I mean "communicating [my] needs and wants in an effort to gain another's understaning or compliance." In other words, I want to stop being such a passive and/or passive aggressive ninny and start getting WHAT. I. WANT.

So far, things have been going well. I took a dip in the scary self-assertion bath last weekend and expressed my feelings or rather my hurt/damaged/confused feelings to the man I've been dating for the past two months and although I blubbered through the whole thing, it felt wonderful to actually express myself and be understood and validated (well, between sobbing fits he could understand).

In all my relationships, I don't think I've ever been fully honest about what I wanted or how I felt about the relationship. Instead, I usually waited to know what he wanted or what he was ready for or what he was able to give me. And if it wasn't what I wanted I either let the relationship die off or remained for a while, unhappy and resentful. More than anything, it was my lack of communication that sabotaged my previous relationships.

Er...

Okay, this is getting very Dr. Phil-esque.

Actually, you know what? I feel that you should listen to my drivel and I want you to like it!

Um, yeah, self-assertion...self-assertion...